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ICQ Chat Save file
Started on Mon Nov 03 20:54:15 1997

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hi
hello.
so, any new email?
i don’t know i haven’t checked
well, why don’t you check…
why aren’t you at coffee
because I’ve been sitting here since I got off the phone with you answering email from work.
cause i want to talk to you do you need to finish your email reading instead
no, I’m done, I was just about to get off.
to complicated for a begginer
You can check your email and chat eith me at the same time…
of, well, okay. so what’s up?
nothing honey
ha
I tell you what< how about if I check your mail while we talk???
:P
ha ha ha
my estrogen would kick your testosterone’s ass
but seroiusly folks, what cha doing on the computer?
i was going to find out when that band plays again
yeah, if you estrogen would ever see me,then maybe it would get a chance to kick my ass.
i am sorry i feel dumped
what are you talking about?
its an expression the same as down in the dumps
well, if you are depressed, then why don’t you want me to come over?
dumps bring other people down with them
i have to many things to do and no desire to acomplish them
unhuh. sounds hokey to me… Okay, maybe not hokey, but i think you should elaborate… I mean you almost never tell me how you feel, are you aware of that?
no i thought i did
no, I asked you several times to explain and you never really idicated to me that you were depressed. Why? do you know?
i don’t know if it is deppression its just a horrible case of no motivation which i assume could be classified as down in the dumps
you, my dear, have no motivation for precisely the same reason why I get edgy when doing new things…
what reason is that

You are at your last semester at community college
you still don’t really have an idea what you want to be when you “grow up”
you do’t know how next semester is going to work out.
you’ll have to get a new job.
you’ll have to make some new friends.

yup you figured me out
I know exactly how you feel. But I won’t let you feel that way.
And you know what? I’m not going to “put Up” with you feeling that way because life is too short, and you are too good of a person.
Besides, i love you.

So here is what WE are going to do.
WE are getting an apartment.
WE are moving out.
WE are going to get you into school.
WE are going to live happily ever after.
There. feel better?
okay thanks i really needed that
really?
yup
CAn I ask a question?
does it require brain power
no, just honesty.
okay
if you knew that was the problem, then why didn’t you tell me that? did you expect me to think you were dumb or something? I fely you do now, I have had those feelings… I tried to kill myself before because of the general feeling of hopelessness and insecurity. Why wouldn’t you tell me something like that?
i generally don’t like to dump my problems on someone else
Dump is not the word to use. You don’t DUMP problems on me. you can’t. I told you before…
I’m in a good mood and you, my dear, are going to have to wait your turn if you think you’ll depress me. :)

sometimes when i would tell my problems i would begin to feel insecure around that person
you are the all knower :)
All I know is this: if you don’t fess up on things that are bugging you, and things that you don’t feel confident it persuing alone, then how am I supposed to help you? I want you to be yourself around me. you know you already have me whipped, what are you going to lose by telling me how you feel?
okay

I knew it as soon as you told me you wanted to hand deliver the paperwork.
You think we are different, but I tell you, we are not. I tried stunts like that… Trust me, I’ll help you don anything that you want to do. the only thing I want in return is a smile and appreciation… but there is one thing that I will absolutely, positively not take the lead on…
aren’t you going to ask what?

what

do wedding planning.
what?

THat’s right. You can get me to cook, clean, buy and fix your cars, repair roofs, but I won’t do wedding planning.
so i can do it all by myself
well, I’ll help, but I won’t take any lead onb that whatsoever.
have you been talking to *****

no, but i hear all the stpuid crap that they do, and frankly, I’m not impressed.
what stupid crap
well, all that bridesmaid dress shopping for one.
did ***** drag him along
going to a wedding extravaganza..

yes
sometimes i feel a little more independant than *****

and sometimes i feel a little less whipped than *****
when it comes to weddings
but we are getting a way from a crucial point…
(I won’t)

this means you can’t complain about my choices
do you want to go to sam in the spring?
yes
do you want me to live there?
yes
do you want me to help you achieve these goals?
yes what happened you were bound and determined a while back

I’m just asking to make sure you want this… the last thing in the worls that I want to do is to force someithnig on you that you aren’t ready to deal with.
no i know i can deal i just can deal better with a bound and determined partner:)

well, I’m bound and determined. But– you, my dear, must sill make the choices. I will help you pursue anything you want. And, so, for starters, we are getting that stupid application out there pronto.

you need to get it in quickly because otherwiese you are going to have problems finding a job, and all that other good stuff, are you getting your dad to take you up there on thursday or what?
yup come hell or high water

well, if the high water hits, I may have to go back to work friday, and I’ll get someone to drop it off.
thanks will you be gone friday night
not if I can help it. What are you doing friday?
okay nuting honey
no, are you working?
yes 2-8
well, that precludes the concept of you coming with me…
okay. look, I don’t know what the story is, moring glory, but I will tell you this:

I’m a bad man (like B-AAA-D) and no one understands him but his–

okay, never mind. look, here’s the scoop. you have 3 weeks to get your app in or I will go up there and get an apartment on my own :P

thankyou for your support
okay
I’m joking. Anyway, once you get accepted, then we can look at aprtments. Depending on the arrangement, I may just pay the whole damn rent myself. (hey not bad, huhnh?)
i never said you were bad your just butter

i have to go and study now
tehe.
talking to you made me feel better:)
well, I’m still telephoning you later, because I have no idea how many tears you have shed or laughs or any of that other kinda stuff. But I’m getting some food, and going to get some coffee.
And you didn’t want me to come over.. unhunh. well, missy, I’m here for you and I hope you feel better.
i do
want me to come ovwer?
love you
you can come over wed and help me clean my room
we can orgonize together
that’s better. I mean, I live for cleanin’ rooms ;)

i know well bye love you
ilove you
call you later.
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